Wednesday, May 31, 2017

Twists and turns

Moving... Again. For the 5th time since graduation two years ago my entire life is packed into boxes, bags and cars. I have moved west then back east. The a bit west now a bit more west, New Britain CT. With each new twist and turn my life has taken me God and my family have been there for me. And not just my biological family, but my faith family​ as well. From praying for me to being there to listen to my fears to being kind enough to drive and help with the heavy lifting.  Thank you.
As I sat reading for the last time in the old apartment I watched the fog slowly disappear from the landscape before me. As it did I could see farther and farther into the distance. The thought came to mind that that is how God works sometimes. Slowly showing us just bits and pieces of His plan for our lives. But throughout all the twists and turns of life He is right there guiding us. As the Psalmist says in Psalm 121:3-4 "He will not suffer thy foot to be moved: he that keepeth thee will not slumber. Behold, he that keepeth Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep." Interesting fact about this passage, it is from the Songs of Ascents or Psalms of Degrees. That is to say that this is one of the Psalms that the Jewish people would sing as they went up to Jerusalem for the feasts and festivals. The road was hard and long for some. Jerusalem was set on a hill so the travellers had to climb up to the city.  History lesson​ finished, back on track. Not to open the can of worms that is free will verseus predestination. I believe that God has a path for each one of us and went we truly search our the will of God he shows us that path. Now I do not always get it right, but went I do mess up God is kind and shows me where I went wrong and how to fix it. There have even been times in my life (one fairly recent) where I have seen Him keep me and not allowed my foot to be moved. And it is hard at the moment but looking back I am glad for it. 
So my prayer for you (and myself) is that we would be so close to God at we can easily follow where he leads us.
                                          Jeremiah 29:11-13

Saturday, May 6, 2017


"Yes", "No" and "Wait" are the simplified answers God gives to our prayers. As people we love the word Yes,  hate the word No and have a love hate relationship with the word Wait. In Christian circles, at lest the ones I run in, you rarely hear about the prayers that receive a No to. Rather our church testimony times are filled with the praises for all the Yes`s God gives. This past week God answered two major prayer request in my life. One He answered with a very clear "NO!!!" Honestly, I was devastated. I wanted that thing so bad that I did not really listen to God till to late. I did not see any flashing red lights so I moved forwards. My family tried to show me the red lights going off in their eyes when they looked at the situation, but I played the part of the fool and did not listen to them. For that I am truly sorry. God is good and in control. He used that hurt and pain to show me that it was not Him that failed but Me who failed (again). In my disappointment, pain  and confusion after the No came I wrote these words to a friend of mine. "I need to know that I will be able to trust God like Abraham did with Isaac.(Genesis 22) And I am having trouble trusting His goodness."  Here I am I have been saved since the age of 3 and have seen time and time again Gods goodness, yet I doubted because something did not go my way!??!? How shallow my trust must have been! My friend replied this: "God is good. He's demonstrated that to you in the past. He is always the same, and the God that died for you on the cross is the same one wanting to wrap you in a hug right now. It's not God's fault that a person hurt you-- that's on the person himself." My friend is very wise, she pointed me back to the truth of what I know not the lie of what I was feeling. I know that God is not done working in that area of my life, but is continuity molding me into the woman He needs me to be. 
   The second prayer God answered in one I have been praying for the last 2 years.  Most of you know that since January 30th 2015 I have been suffering from near consent headaches and migraines. Like Paul in 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 I prayed for this to be healed. For the last 2 years God has given me the answer He gave Paul in verse 9 "And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me."  To shorten that God was saying "Wait".  For the last 2 weeks I have been getting a different kind of headache every time I turned my head left, very annoying in my job. My mom said that it was most likely a pinched nerve and the only way to fix it was to see a chiropractor.  So yesterday, a super crazy plan changing day, I went to the chiropractor. He took x rays of my neck and found that one of the vertebra was off kilter, was was my jaw. He told me that this vertebra is the one whole head swivels on. The fact that it was not the way it should be was properly the main reason for my headaches!! Well that and the fact that my neck does not curve the right way. Now we get to the really awesome part, the chiropractor said that he can fix my vertebra and reduce the amount of headaches I get in about 2-3 months!! (fixing the neck will take about a year of me being diligent and working hard at it.)  So even though at the beginning of the week I doubted God and His goodness, He was faithful to restore my faith unto me and to strengthen it. So no matter what you are praying for do not forget that God is good in the No`s , that His faithful in the Wait`s , and definitely worthy of praise for the Yes`s!!