Leah, from Jacob look to I will praise the Lord

Today in church I heard a sermon on Leah, Jacob and their kids. Did you know that names are important? Especially in bible times. Think about it, God changed Abram to Abraham, from Father to Father of Many.  Isaac means "he laughs" , Jacob means trickster and Esau means Hairy. When it came to naming of Leah's and Jacob's kids, Leah picked names the expressed her hearts desire. When she had her first boy she named him Ruben which means Look. In using that name Leah is saying Jacob, husband, look at the son I have given you! Talk about bad names.  Leah named her second son Simeon which means Heard. Leah with this name she is saying The LORD heard me and now Jacob will love me. Leah named her third son Levi which means attached. Leah was saying "I have given Jacob three sons now he will be attached to me." But when we come to Leah's fourth son she named Judah meaning "I will praise the LORD". Leah went from focusing on Jacob to fill the need of love she had to finding it in the LORD. Leah is oft overlooked when the story of  Jacob, no fault of hers. She was not considered beautiful in her culture; in fact her name means cow or weary. Leah lived her entire life in the shadow of her beautiful sister, Rachel, only to be forced into a marriage with a man that love Rachel! God did not compare Leah to Rachel, insted He compared Leah to His son and loved her! When Leah compared herself to her sister she was disappointed, but when she stopped fighting for Jacobs attention she found peace. How often do I do that? To this day I am constantly comparing myself to those around me, especially  my sisters. I let myself be distracted and disappointed with how I am not like my sisters that I lose sight of what makes me special. The devil tries to convince me that I will never be as pretty as Hannah,  happy as Abby, confident as Samantha and as determined as Rachel. These thought try to shove out the facts and truths God tells me. God tells me He loves me as I am, how He MADE me, that He has a plan for me and that He sees me in light of His son. So stop trying to be someone your not, remember who you are in Christ and that nothing can make Him stop loving you.

Slow Learner

Ever feel like you are a slow learner? I do. why must I be so slow to learn the lessons God has for me? Every time I feel like I have a grasp on trusting God with everything I get blindsided and slat I fail again. But God is always faithful and never leaves me flat on my face. He always picks me up again. He is so good. Today I had to get a credit card so that I can pay for my dog Pip to get a surgery done in a few weeks. As I dove away from the vets office this overwhelming fear of  "what in the world am I going to do" brought me to the point of tears. As I drove back to my moms to drop off Pippy and apply for the plastic card of doom, the song Bulletproof by Citizen-way came on over my radio. Right at a point I was feeling less then "bulletproof".  The chorus goes :

"I got my armor now

No fear no doubt gonna shoot me down

Now I’m bulletproof because of you You 

Because of You

And now I’m bulletproof because of you You 

Because of You

You conquered the grave

Your love Love made a way

Now I’m not afraid"

God used those words to lift me out of the valley of  fear and sorrow.  Then a bit later He was so good to use another song to help me understand the power of waiting. That song was Hard Love by Needtobreathe.  

"You know the situation can't be right

And all you ever do is fight

But there's a reason that the road is long

It take some time to make your courage strong

Hold on tight a little longer

What don't kill ya, makes ya stronger

Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love

You can't change without a fallout

It's gon' hurt, but don't you slow down

Get back up, 'cause it's a hard love  "

When you get blindsided with fear, doubt and life in general remember that God is still in control, and that He still has a plan. (still working on that!)